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January 15, 2009

January 15.2009

Topic: Surrender

    I have received messages on this topic before but it seems relevant to
write on it again right now.  I have been involved in reading a book that
has me thinking and meditating on the idea of letting go.  As I have been
doing so more clarity on this topic is coming through and I am being led to
share it with all of you.

     We have all heard this concept : let go of control and allow what
should happen to happen, or what is meant to happen to happen.  Its always
seemed like a nice idea to me.  Something I want to do, but when push
comes to shove I revert back into trying to control things again.  Like I
can not trust the universe and need to "do it myself".  I have been seeing
both through this book I am reading and through talking with others that I
am not alone in my struggles with this.  Its the mark of a wise and profound person to be able to let go of the reins when things are tough.

    I always tried to force myself to let go.  Knowing that it was the
"right" thing to do based on the trust I have for God and the universal
energy that supports us.  Forcing the letting go however did not work.  I would say I am just going to let go of my control and see what happens.  Then slowly thoughts about what I could do, or what I might be missing if I failed to act would creep in and I would find myself justifying why I needed to take back control.  Frankly I lacked the patience to handle this forced method of letting go.

    Recently in my meditations and random thoughts I have come to know a
different way to approach this letting go.  Mainly inspired by the book
"Deeksha".  I was shown a different way to embrace my shadow side and to
begin to let go of control in a gentler and more slow manner, without
force.  In fact the insights I have received from my inner guidance based
on the knowledge I have taken in from this book seem almost counter
intuitive to letting go.  The action is quite simple and yet incredibly
profound.  What I am being gently led to do is to just notice the emotions
and thoughts I have when I am trying to control things.  Not only notice
them but also claim them as me.  No more asserting will power and
struggling against these shadow parts of myself.  Its about the big
surrender that causes all other little surrenders to happen.  Deciding to
give up the struggle for perfection.

    Its ok to be all the parts of who we are, the good and the bad.
Recognizing this is a huge step.  Notice those thoughts and emotions, claim
them, acknowledge them and then most importantly let them go.  I noticed a
huge shift once I began acknowledging the "bad" part of myself- I am the
one who keeps myself connected and grounded in those negative traits.  By
refusing to look at them they were left to grow subconsciously.  I gripped
them and held on to the thoughts based in those negative traits- all the
while saying " I hate it that I get so angry, or impatient, or lust after
this or that"  But I indulged in allowing myself to continue to think about
them endlessly, mainly because I would not claim them as my thoughts and
feelings.  I saw it as a battle and thought I had to put my energy into suppressing them, which only led to my mind being fixed on them.  Once I began saying " yep that's me" when ever one of the thoughts came to the surface. I would notice the negative thought would then try to float away.  I say try because I also noticed a subconscious part of me grabbing
and holding onto those thoughts and feelings.  A huge revelation.

    So the focus this week is to first just notice and acknowledge those
parts of yourself that are not what you want to show the world.
Acknowledge the thoughts (not necessarily acting on them).  Notice them as
part of who you are and then watch and allow them to drift away exposing
other pieces of who you are.  There is a continual cycling of positive and negative thoughts always present.  If we acknowledge this and stop holding on, then we can be fully present in our experiences and not wrapped up in our own thoughts and inner struggles. Allow yourself time to base your actions from the pieces of you that are positive.  It does not require  suppressing or denying the parts that are less flattering.  The more you deny those parts the harder they fight for control or come up in the day to day shifts in thoughts and feelings we all experience.  Its a surrender in the need to keep trying to look perfect.  Underneath it all we all struggle with the same things, the same thoughts and feelings. The same "darkside".  We are all also equally perfect and imperfect to eachtoher.  The drama ends when we decide to quit putting on the show.

      Do not rush this process.  Spend days or weeks just noticing
temptations, feelings and acknowledging them as a part of the larger
picture of who you are.  Get a full view of who you are when you are not trying to look a certain way, but just being who you really are, faults and all. Notice how you fluctuate between positive versions
of yourself and not so positive versions.  Notice the timing and the
triggers, notice how long each phase lasts without judgment or suppression.  Then acknowledge that all of these phases are you, the ever changing you that is not fixed in a certain mode of behavior or thought.  Finally begin acknowledging the negative states and what they teach you, and begin waiting for a proper state to cycle in before you act in certain situations, without force but just from knowledge that your thought are always in flux.  I hope that you find as I have just begun
to find, that by not stuffing the negative, that soon these negative states
surface less often and last a lot less longer than they once did.  Notice
if you are grabbing and holding on to any states and begin trying to
surrender and trust that the parts of you that are needed in a given
situation will come on their own with out force, and leave when they are
not needed.  Its an amazing process once you see it in yourself you then
begin to see it in other people and things around you.  This process allows
us to see the Truth more clearly.  Enjoy getting to really know all of who you are.

With Love and Truth


January 01, 2009

January 2009- year at a glance

Topic: Overview of 2009

Last year when I began sending these out to more people, outside the few close friends I started with,  I began by doing a larger overview of the entire year.  This is a less specific, more general look at particular months or periods during the whole year and what the energy of those times supports in our lives.

An overarching theme this coming year is that of seeing those repeated patterns in our world.  Like the structure and mechanism of an atom is similar to the structure and make up of our solar system.  There are patterns that are repeated from individuals, to our systems, to all of humanity.  These patterns will become ever more evident in this coming year.  It will be predictable that the shift we experience personally will be transferred into our immediate circles, into our government systems and into nature its self and back again.  This past year many people have experienced a deep feeling of self change, like the way we viewed the world and our lives shifted.  The old ways of operating suddenly were not going to work so we were pushed to try to find something new.  Some people gave in and rolled with these changes, experiencing them with little effort or discomfort.  Some people fought the changes and continue to fight them at every step, creating a
feeling of struggling against a current and feeling very uncomfortable.

These changes are now going to echo through the larger systems.  Proof that indeed we are all really interconnected at a deeper level.  The changes that made us feel like the old ways would not work for us as individuals are now impacting the systems.  Again those systems can become fluid and allow the changes that this energy is trying to make sweep over them effortlessly or the system and the people running them can fight against it.  The important thing to remember in both the individual and the more global scale is that the changes this energy is trying to bring are in our best interest.  Fighting will only bring discomfort. 

This coming year when the old way does not seem to be working, we need widen out our perspectives so that we can see the whole picture and see the new path that is being laid.  This could be personal opportunities for change and it could be new systems springing up to replace what is now outmoded.  Either way this coming year is about making those leaps of faith and embracing the changes.

With that framework of the overall energy of the coming year in mind lets now look a little closer at segments of the coming year.  This year is going to start out with time for quiet reflection.  Generally winter is a great time for this anyway but this January seem particularly conducive to hibernating inorder to get back in touch with that inner divinity.  I know for myself this past month was a whirlwind.  Time seems to be flying by.  When I tuned in to this coming year it seemed like things would not slow down but that January was a bit of a gift.  It is time to withdraw for a short time to go inside ourselves and to feel that inner connection to the divine.  People who choose not to use this time to strengthen that connection will still find they have down time.  These will be the people we know who report that they feel like they are going stir crazy.  They are going to miss the point of what this month is for.  This month is about meditation (in
whatever form you meditate- mainly in slowing down and being present in the moment and aware of your inner connection to God).  Its a gift, it will be cold and there will not be reason to venture out much.  The weather will support our choosing to stay in and have this quiet time.  Take it, guilt free and enjoy it.

February things begin to happen again.  The weather seems like it begins to be more conducive to getting out and having fun with people and in nature.  It feels like this is the beginning of the awakening from the slumber of winter.  This month is about reconnecting with people, forming new connections or reuniting with old friends and family we have lost touch with.  It feels like a time of unity with people in general. We will crave companionship and seek out connections.  The new connections and repaired old connections will serve us in our own development throughout this year.  Pay attention to the people you meet or reconnect with in this month.  It seems like they will be carrying messages about where our paths are leading.  Do not dismiss these events as coincidence make sure to write them down or take mental note of these meetings and the information or insights you get from others this month.

March and April continue with pushes from the universe as to where we are headed individually and collectively.  In our personal lives we will begin to have experiences that help us to feel more sure of where we are meant to be, what we should be doing.  I know for myself I used to be very sure of what I was meant to do and then suddenly this year, that was challenged, leaving me flailing.  March and April seem like the energy and experiences will help us all feel more clear on what is coming next in our own lives.  At the beginning of this message I mentioned the echo effect and it is definitely true in this month.  The new forms of our old outmoded systems will begin to take shape in the form of ideas and concepts.  Not quite ready for the full shift, this is the beginning of what is coming to be personally and globally.

May is about shedding what is left of the old.  Those of us clinging to the old things that are no longer serving us will experience a tearing away.  We may feel this is a horrible time in our lives and wonder what is going wrong.  The answer is... nothing.  Its simply time to let go of some old baggage to make way for the things that were set into motion in March and April.  For some, they will have worked hard to let go on their own and they may experience this month as a calm.  But for most people there will be a purging of those things we were not quite ready to let go of.  Like everything it is necessary and what will eventually come in will be so much more conducive to our future selves.  This will also be seen on an individual scale as well as nationally and globally.  Things must fall inorder to leave room for them to be rebuilt in a new more appropriate way for where we are now.  The key to avoiding the feeling of the bottom falling out in this
month is to continue to listen to our inner knowing.
That knowing will be sending us signals in March and April and if we head those signals May will be a gradual shift.  If we do not listen to our inner knowing May will feel like a major upheaval.

During June and July the dust will be settling.  This is a time of rest again.  That rest may take the form on quiet time away, or doing things we love with family and friends.  Its allowing ourselves time to digest the changes that were either made by us or imposed on us in May.  This period gives us time to reflect on what we had to let go of and to begin forming and solidifying what is beginning to take shape for the future.  The overall feeling is like taking a deep breath and sighing it out after a period of hard work.

August is about solidifying the changes that we were lead towards in March and April.  This is the manifesting of the new into our lives, whether they be literal changes in jobs, relationships, systems, life choices or changes in beliefs or how we perceive our lives and the world around us. The shift will be noticeable and after living without the old and with the new quite not ready to be manifest until now, this month will feel good.  There is some fear associated with the energy of this month, mainly fear of the unknown.  This is the part where our greatest desires begin to come true and we have to decide if we are "worthy" or not.  Know that if your inner knowing led you to this point you are "worthy". We only are given things we are worthy to receive.  There may also be a fear of making a wrong choice, or a mistake during this month.  Again rely on that inner knowing, take time to get quiet and you will know what is right, even when everyone around
says it is wrong.  When we take emotion and analyzing out of our way we are free to flow with what was meant to be based on instinct and inner wisdom.  That is the guiding force within each person that will never leave and will always lead us in the right direction.

September seems to be a challenging month.  The overall feeling is of coldness and doubt.  This month serves a purpose.  It is important for us to be grounded in our new lives, ways of thinking and perceiving the world.  It is easy to go with something new when things feel good, but to make a lasting change we have to commit to staying with our choices even when things do not feel good.  This month is about the shadow side, confronting the lingering doubts we have about the changes we have experienced.  On a large scale people will be calling for a return to the old systems, they will be pointing out the flaws of the new and wanting to revert back to what "used to be".  The same feeling will be experienced by individuals. There will be an inner nudge to just go back to how things used to be.  The flaws of our new choices will be exposed and we will be challenged to see if we really believe in ourselves.  The message is to understand the purpose to
examine the "flaws" in our new plans and new systems and to build on those.  Going back to the old is not an option at this point.  There is a reason we moved on from the old.  Do not be tempted into back tracking, stand firm in what you know as underlying truth even when appearances may point to something completely different.

October we finally emerge and can look back at what we learned through the experiences of September.  This is a month to integrate what we learned during the previous month.  The feeling is that of the Phoenix rising up from the ashes.  There is a feeling of being very self assured and self confident in this month.  This happens as the choices we made endured the previous months attacks and now the changes sink deep within us.  The shifts we have made up until this point begin to be seen in our deeper beliefs and soul shifts.  Its a very positive month where we can feel good about ourselves, our lives, and our world.

November and December feels like a huge systems shift.  Like new leaders emerge on a global scale.  Corporate, government, in every area there seems to be a feeling of change and of new. It feels like all the changes we experienced as individuals really rev up on a national and global scale.  Even though system were changing with us, in many ways those systems were waiting for us to change first.  This marks the beginning for more radical government and system shifts.  There may be growing pains and disputes about those changes but again keeping our eye on the bigger picture and trusting that what emerges will be exactly as it is supposed to be will get us through any discomfort.

That last line applies to this whole year.  Its a year of more great changes, and with change come discomfort sometimes.  But if we keep our eyes on the big picture and believe that we are truly watched over and that there is a divine plan evidence in the repeated patterns of our universe, then we will know everything is exactly as it should be.  Knowing that bring us through the hard times and keeps that inner flame of hope burning for the future.

The process of this coming year is like that of nature and the shifting of the seasons:  Fall is about he dying away and letting go of the old, The leaves on the trees have to let go with faith that the spring will bring rebirth.  Winter is about dormancy and inner reflection as nature retreats under the blanket of snow.  Spring brings budding and the rebirth of the new.  Summer its the full bloom of potential with its heat and passion full of activity. This coming year has all these elements and it is a process repeated in our lives just as it is repeated in nature.  Our job is to trust this process and get out of our own way. 

Have a great New Year and remember to continue to try to connect to that inner knowing, that inner spark daily.  It is your guide and when you trust that spark you will always be in the right place, at the right time, with the right people. 

With Love and Truth


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